Save My Marriage: A Desperate Call
How to save My marriage
Deciding that is time to save my marriage is the easy part. Now it’s time for both of you to put in the hard work of sorting through your issues and renewing your connection. Here are some steps that can help.
Looking at marriage nowadays from the perspective of someone who is on her thirties I would say is still pretty ideal. Ideal in a sense that the world today do not put too much weight on the sanctity of marriage and the people who would say want to commit themselves to the other will leisurely go in and out of it. So when people talk about marriage, it will still be the same thing for me: a lifelong commitment to the other to put his needs first before yours because he does the same thing for you too. Not everybody in my age bracket shares this with me, though. Many of them would rather be in a live in partnership where they can easily get away if they hate the other person already and go back if they still want to.
For someone to say “save my marriage” will be a request or a command that cannot be done. Married couples can go to counseling, psychiatric help or treatment but these are merely things that help you in saving the marriage. It is never something that other people can do for you. If you are in a relationship, no matter what kind it is, there are certain elements that should be in it because if they are not in the relationship, you are already in a broken one:
1) Respect.
This kind of respect is the type that is earned and not demanded; the kind that does not plead for it nor beg. This is the respect that does not place titles nor entitles one to the respect. You respect the other person because he deserves to be respected. People will initially have that ounce of respect anyway but it will be how the other person tries to earn it that will make the other person give a little more. When this is commanded, it is no longer respect but a mere obedience.
2) Trust.
Again this is something that has to be earned. This is a hard thing to do, especially when the other has already broken it before. The track record, though it should not define who the other person is, should be consistent. One way for that someone who pleads “save my marriage” could get this trust in the relationship is to be honest with each other. Having a relationship that does not hide anything will allow you to be open spiritually and mentally. A no holds barred and non-judgmental talk will be your key to fixing the marriage. Resolve with a renewed trust for each other because the incident that may have broken the trust should make you a stronger couple and not break what you have.
3) Share.
This is where communication is highly important. When you share yourself, you have to let the other person know how happy it makes you feel to share. It is important that the other person also gets his time to do so. Sharing is what makes the marriage successful. It is what makes the partners feel they are in each other’s lives. Without the spirit of sharing, you live alone and lonely. This is not how marriages work out. If what you want is the only thing important, then you should live in an island and not be with another person who longs to share.
Save my marriage sounds like a desperate cry of someone who does not know what to do. It is more likely that this person knows what the problem is but denies that it is a problem. Check the three things stated above and maybe one of them needs some kind of repair.
